Menopause, Teens & a 6-week Summer Holiday

Remember the days when Summer Holidays were filled with soft play, parks and non-stop entertainment? We would be financially broken, feel exhausted and physically knackered!

We dreamed of the kids being a bit older, so we didn’t have to rush around as much. Well, I now have 3 teens and I’m finally there! With the kids being 15,16 and 17 I’m in the stage of my life where I thought I wouldn't be needed..

..Well.. I am needed, just in different ways.

I can honestly say that this year's Summer Holidays were the hardest I’ve ever been through. Menopause was raging, the sun was blazing and the hormones were flowing - 2 teen girls and a teen boy!

The house was a jumble. It was hard to figure out who was on low power mode & needed to recharge, who was hyper & needed something to do, who needed more cuddles, who couldn't bear to be touched. They also stay up so much later now, which was exhausting - I like an earlyish bed time, 10pm at the latest. I know I could have gone to bed, but we like to put the dogs in their beds, shut the house up and know where everyone is before we drift off ourselves. I was then up for work the next day whilst they slept in, and when they did wake up they were like zombies - eating all the food in the house. I lost track of how many trips to the shops I made, or how much it cost us to feed them over those 6 weeks.

Now with all that, throw menopausal me into the mix!

I spent the summer feeling lost. Realising that they just don’t need me as much anymore. I felt lonely, like I didn’t have a place in their world. I found myself sitting on my own in the middle of the chaos. And I know this is what we’ve all been working towards, but it just didn’t feel right. It felt odd. I found myself crying during a beach trip because I didn’t know where I belonged or what to do! Crazy isn’t it; we all wanted peace and quiet, and now I’m not in demand any more I don’t know what to do!

I’m at a stage of menopause where I feel like I'm being gaslit by my children, because I don’t remember conversations or decisions I've made (see my previous blog post for that story). I've got brain fog so I cant hold a conversation with them. I'm overstimulated but also not sleeping, so when I hear 'When's dinner? What's for dinner? .. Ew, I don't want that for dinner!' I just get so angry!

So, a couple of weeks in, I decided to spend the holidays looking for those little glimmers. Finding fun in late night films. Playing Uno together. Soaking up quality time with Catalina when she wanted to work with me in the salon. Making the most of Lux's hugs. Switching up my mindset definitely helped us all.

Next summer will be even stranger for me - they'll be 18, 17 and 16! One will be off to University, one off to an Apprenticeship, and one taking on their GCSEs. It’ll be another Summer of figuring things out, experiencing some new feelings.

All I can hope is that I can function in it all a bit better!